I Wonder Why

He who binds to himself
A joy
Doth the winged life destroy.
He who kisses the joy
As it flies
Lives in Eternity's sunrise. Blake

It's been many many days
Since I had any such wonderings
Of consequence.
(To me at least)
I wondered last night,
As I dished out this verse to T,
Whether I really believed in it,
Or is it just a romantic notion,
Or is it just the beauty in sequencing of words.
I'm still a walking contradiction as the dawn breaks.
I cant decide.
Now,
I just realised,
That the reason why i cant make up my mind,
Why I cant comprehend,
The meaning of this verse to me,
Is simply because,
I've twisted it to suit me.
All this while,
I've interpreted it in my fashion;
That is,
"joy" as 'love interest',
Which was as it applied to T.
So when i currently see the verse for what it is,
In its originality,
I see its meaning,
And subsequently,
Its beauty.

I was wondering also,
As i was brushing my teeth just,
About this insect,
Motionless on my bathroom mirror.
It was inert and impassive.
Which was what I prescribed,
And perceive it to be.
Maybe it was afraid,
Or just hoping I wont notice.
Anyway,
I wondered about why,
Why this insect is here,
What is its purpose?
I mean,
It's not a spectacular insect,
It doesnt have many colours;
It's just common,
With 6 thin spindly legs,
And a boring grey body.
So what is its function?
I'm inclined to think,
That everyone serves a purpose in the grand scheme of life,
Or else,
Why would we even exist?
(Who's purpose?)
*I'm not talking God, His creation, and religion here*
I wondered if I'm being too presumptuous here.
Can I just wonder about its existence,
And its place in the whole scheme of things?
I mean,
I dont even know my place and my existence!!!
And i'm assuming details about it,
When i dont even know it,
When i dont even know what it does,
What it eats.
Maybe it knows its purpose in life.
Maybe it knows why it is here for.
I was assuming it doesnt know,
Because I'm the one who's fretful about such stuff.
Suddenly,
It dawned upon me,
That I (or we) tend to lapse into such assumptions and perception,
When we are clueless about stuff,
So we imbue upon them,
Our own understanding and view,
Which might be false to a fault.

A fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees.
Blake