Ages

It's been ages since I last blogged.
Yeah.
What's new?
The last 20 days have been a blur.
Arts camp was one reason.
The other was coz I've been bumming around too bloody much.
I think about what I do with my hols,
And what others do with theirs,
And I duly noted the differences in attitude.
Granted,
There was no financial need for me to look for a job.
And I felt no shame in bugging my mum for my monthly allowances.
Sigh...
My account's empty at the end of every single month,
And I'm freaking 23 soon.
Talk about being a failure.
It's easy to slam oneself.
It's easy to overlook one's own flaws.
It's ironic I guess.
I'm terrible with finances.
Not a good omen.
I'm terrible with discipline.
Not a good sign either.
I'm juz plain lucky.
Juz plain lucky.
Sometimes I wonder when my luck will run its course.
Maybe that's when I'll finally realise,
Realise that my life should be charted by myself,
My own hard work and toil,
Not shaped by luck or its accomplice.
Someday.
Maybe someday.
Why not today?
Since I realise the problem now,
Why dont I do anything about it?
That is precisely my point.
Sigh...
Think that is enough self-deprecation for one night.